Last week I delivered this quilt to this angel mom. Staci has lost, not one, but two babies. I cry just thinking about the enormity of that loss. She lost her son Bridger over 4 years ago at 10 months old. Then she recently lost her daughter Finleigh just about two months ago at 18 days old. Both babies were born with congenital heart defects. To read more of their story, and see photos of these beautiful angels, check out Staci’s blog.
Staci and I met for lunch. I have to admit, I was a little nervous. I wondered if I had anything to offer her given all she has gone through and continues to go through. She has truly lived through every parents worst nightmare, not once, but twice. I felt so inadequate to offer her any semblance of comfort. At the same time I was also eager to meet another mom who gets it.
When we met, and began talking, I quickly realized that while both of our losses are different, they are also the same. We know what it feels like to continue living with a broken heart. To continue walking through a world that is shattered and forever altered. Staci and I immediately began commiserating about our experiences. It was refreshing to cut through all the superficial sentiments and delve straight into the depths of our experiences. We talked for two hours and could have talked for many more if other obligations didn’t pull us back into our daily lives. We told our stories and also talked about transformations, family, faith, hope, coping and continuing to survive.
I left feeling so grateful to have met her. I loved the experience of just meeting her and talking like we have been in each others’ lives for years. She has some amazing and beautiful perspectives on life and faith because of her losses and I hope to adopt some of them. I can also deeply connect with the pain and despair that is present as well. I hope she and I will continue to connect in the future.
I also had this fantasy in my head that our sweet babies in heaven knew we were getting together and in some way joined us that afternoon. It’s a thought that makes me smile.