I wasn’t really thinking about my birthday as it approached. I was more preoccupied with my 20 week ultrasound that we scheduled for the day before my birthday. I’m not quite 20 weeks but a blood test I took at 16 weeks revealed elevations in my alpha fetal protein, a marker for spinabifida. Our doctor tried to be reassuring and for our peace of mind we scheduled my 20 week ultrasound at 18 weeks. The day before my ultrasound I was so nervous I felt nauseated.
But we got GREAT news on Friday! There is no evidence of spinabifida! Our baby is growing well and looks healthy! The perinatologist told us that my first trimester bleeding and subchorionic hemorrhage that is still hanging out in my uterus, likely accounts for the elevated alpha fetal protein levels. And even though my clot is still there and still a concern, the further along I get in pregnancy, the less concerned the doctors get. The perinatologist predicts that my clot will no longer be visible on ultrasound by 28 weeks.
Chad and I were immensely relieved! We felt a huge burden lift from our shoulders. And it was such a joy to see our baby and see her thrive.
And yes, I am referring to our baby as a “she” because we found out we are having a girl!
I am most relieved that our baby looks healthy and this pregnancy continues to progress. I am also excited about having a girl. There is a part of me that is a little disappointed as I hope to have another boy one day. But more than anything, I am excited for a healthy baby and there is so much about having a girl that is relieving. With all the trauma of losing Charlie to SIDs and knowing that boys are 50% more likely to die of SIDs than girls, I am relieved to have a baby with lower risk of SIDs by virtue of her gender. Further, it’s nice to have another baby that will just be different. This baby will be born in summer, not winter, and it’s a girl. As a result I am less worried about all the trauma reminders I’d face if I had another baby boy born in winter. Like I said, I hope to have another boy one day. I think it’d be very healing to have another son; a son who lives. But for our next child, it feels perfect that it’s a little girl. And Hailee is absolutely thrilled to have a sister!
After our ultrasound, I was on the biggest high I’ve been on since…I can’t remember when. It feels so good to feel like things are going right!
As a result, I really enjoyed my birthday! I treated myself to a pedicure in the morning and that night Chad and I went out with some friends to my favorite restaurant where I gorged myself on sushi! (Don’t worry, it was all tempura sushi!).